In honor of Father’s Day, four men involved in our wonderful theater community share their experience of being a dad during rehearsals and shows. Read more to see their experience in balancing fatherhood and theater.
C.B. Davies
Being a father while doing a show was very exciting but also difficult. It was really special to have my young daughter come to rehearsals and even see some of the shows. I even used my newborn son’s cry for “The Candlesticks” sound effects. But it brings with it many challenges. Managing my time at home and keeping my relationship with my children and wife together. I usually am not home for bedtime which has been difficult for all of us and then add in all the extra rehearsal times.
When I didn’t have kids I could feel okay about not being home in order to do a show. Heck, Dena and I were both out being part of shows. Now I have to really think about if and when I would need to be home for my family.
I do enjoy performing and being part of shows but now I have to think about my kids and how that will affect the show. When I performed in “Peace Warriors” there were a few times because Dena was pregnant and my son was due during the rehearsal period that I had second thoughts about the rehearsals and the show dates. When auditions for “Into the Woods” came up Dena and I discussed if we would audition and it was decided that only one of us should because of our kids at home.
I think managing a family with theater can be the most beautiful thing. I talk about Leia Rose being on stage before we started our run of “After Rome” and how that was so special for me. I see how our involvement in theater really has affected her development but at the same time it can get overwhelming with the time management especially since we are doing so many other things as well including our theater journeys.
Daniel Lewin
Being a father of a toddler, plus my wife being pregnant with our second child, equals a really hard time to do theatre. To explain, I had been cast in 2 musicals. First one was Oliver, and then midway I was cast in Into The Woods. This was making things really difficult with my schedule as I would come home from work, only have about an hour or 2 to spend with my wife and son, and then head straight to rehearsals. Unfortunately, as supportive as my wife was with me doing this, it was also a lot of work for her to handle. This started putting guilt on my shoulders with the fact that I wasn’t at home enough to help out. Unfortunately, as fun as it was to perform in the shows, the feeling of guilt still stuck with me.
The experience of doing theatre without having a child yet was of course easier and less pressuring. I knew after rehearsals or a show that I wouldn’t need to run back home in a hurry or feel any guilt (also because my wife and I were in 2 shows together when we got married).
With or without kids, I still enjoy doing shows. It is an undying love of mine. One thing that was amazing was the fact that both the shows I did recently let me bring my son to a rehearsal. The whole cast and creative team were super supportive of me bringing my son. It made those rehearsals a whole lot more fun. When I needed to rehearse something at that time, cast members would offer to watch him while I worked. Those moments will always mean so much to me. It makes me love doing shows here and being part of such a community SO much more better.
There were for sure times when I felt it was overwhelming for me. 2 shows, the guilt of not being home more often, my wife doing all of the work, really felt like it was a putting a strain. I have learned from this experience that I may need to stick with just one show from now on. I want to be fair to my wife, my kids, and myself. My wife has been an absolute superstar for putting up with it for half a year and I’ll forever appreciate her hard work, love and support. As much as I love theatre also, I will always be there for my kids, no matter what, even if that had to include departing from a show because my kids need me. But I do hope they will also love to be part of doing theatre one day like my wife and and I.
Jeff Fantl
As a father of five, participating in community theater offers its own unique challenges and rewards. On the one hand, time is definitely much more limited when you have a busy household to maintain, and participating in theater is probably one of the most time consuming hobbies there is! Thankfully, my endlessly supportive wife helps make that possible by picking up some of the slack at home when I’m tied up in rehearsals. But these challenges all become worth it when my kids come to see me doing what I love on stage, and when I hear them singing the tunes of “Into the Woods” over and over again at home for months after closing night.
Pascal Roy
I started to learn and do theater when I lived in Madrid, Spain. I used to learn, rehearse and play a lot back then, specializing in comedy and clowning. On July 4, 2003, my daughter Juliette was born. Then I started to do less and less theater, focusing on other “more terrenal” priorities. But theater was always somewhere on my mind. Now I am divorced and live in Israel while my only child lives in Spain. We will celebrate her 20th birthday together soon. I am happy to be back to theater now, especially through the English Community Theater, and my dream is that she comes to see me perform live on a future show (and not only see me on video). I think of her and always dedicate each one of my performances to her.